Well, it was SUPPOSED to be PJ Day

I had the grandest of intentions. Well, actually, it was the lack of grand intentions that made it so grand.

A day where, despite all the alluring things to do, Bonnie, Clyde, and I would stay in our PJs all day and not leave the house.

Except, that I felt the need to shower.

And then, Bonnie decided it was "wear a fancy skirt" day.

And then, Clyde decided to see how many outfits he could put on in one day before Mommy lost her cool. (Answer? Three.)

And the icing on the cake? "Wear a Fancy Skirt" day also meant "Bonnie has bare legs" day, which, in her twisted mind led to "I like to draw faces all over my legs with Mommy's Pen" day.

34 more days. And then they won't be 3 any longer. Not that I'm counting.

20 questions, 3 year old style

Sometimes, the train of thought of a 3 year old is just too much to follow!

Today, in the span of 15 minutes, from Clyde:

Why are there lines? (the grout in the time)
Why are these ones black? (again, tile)
Why are there leaves here? (the nap of the bathroom rug, not leaves at all)
What is this brush for? (makeup brush)
Why is that necklace hanging there? (on my vanity)
Why is those socks grey?
Where did you buy my frog socks?
Why is [Bonnie] still sleeping?
Why is it raining?
Why does the clouds move?
Did God blow all that wind?
When is Halloween?
Did you buy me my red power rangers costume?
Why can't it be my birthday now?
Can I watch Mary Poppins?
Why can't Mary Poppins live here?
Can I fly with an umbrella?
Why is Cooper furry? (dog)
Why don't I have fur?
What's for lunch?
Where is it? (lunch)
Can I eat lunch in here (my bathroom)?

why why why!!!! So many questions. Sometimes I wonder if my responses are really even necessary......

Conversations with a 3 year old....

.......or why my brain can no longer process regular speech.

The following occurred today at approximately 11:30am, while driving home from gymnastics.

Bonnie - Mom, what's after gymnastics?
Me - We're going home to have lunch.
B - What's for lunch?
M - Grilled Cheese
B - And then what?
M - Nap
B - Can I play Play-Doh?
M - Yes you may, but not until after we pick up Dexter from school, after nap.

.........pause.........

B - Mom, are we going to school now?



**sigh**

And this, my friends, is why I'm no longer capable of having a normal conversation. My brain is constantly trying to stay one step ahead of the circular (and frequently misguided) logic I'm bombarded with on an hourly basis. I can no longer say something clearly the first time, apparently, because I'm forced to repeat the same conversation ad nauseam. This frequently leads to sighs of exasperation by one or more parties involved.

Other topics that seem to follow this same pattern include, but are not limited to:
1. Clyde's demand of a red power ranger costume for Halloween (8 months away)
2. The pumpkin patch that is sometimes covered in snow but not always and why pumpkins don't grow year round.
3. The daily list - what is today, what are we doing today.
4. Can I have snack? (usually occurring approximately 5 minutes after the completion of a meal)
5. Why is this drive taking so long? (on the daily drive to pick up Dexter from school. All 15 minutes of it)
6. What is the name of this song? (we listen to Radio Disney. They play the same 8 songs all day long. And yet? It's asked every.single.time.)
7. Do we have to take a bath/shower today?
8. What's for dinner?/I don't like this/I want something else (aka - Mommy is NOT a short order cook)

Have I mentioned that I'm anxious to get the "year of 3" behind us? Two months from tomorrow. Two long looooong months.

In other more pleasant news, Husband returned home from Phoenix yesterday, much to the delight of the household. And apparently? He brought the sun with him. Yay!!!

Bummer.

Dexter announced, on the way home from school today:

"Mom, did you know there's only six weeks 'til summer? The grasshog saw his shadow. It's a bummer........."

Yeah, buddy, it is a bummer. Especially when you realize, six weeks from now, you're still two months away from summer, little man.

And that, my friends, explains EVERYTHING.........

It's been, shall we say, a little rough around here lately. Clyde has a cold (which for him means nebulizer IMMEDIATELY to even have a chance of avoiding pneumonia), Dexter's been on school cancellation and/or 2 hour delay most of the week (meaning our schedule? Totally out of whack), and Bonnie has been beyond fragile (aka - sobbing at the drop of a hat).

I'm racking it all up to screwed up schedules and thus, being extra tired (so much so, in fact, that bedtime has been moved back half an hour WITHOUT argument from the littles).

Tonight, after yet another rousing round of I.will.NOT.eat.this.vile.substance.for.dinner.and.you.can't.make.me!!!!! (because, you know, flank steak IS punishment in it's most cruel and unusual form....), followed by "bathtime is now only tolerable if the puppet washcloth is involved", Bonnie offered an interesting perspective. As we were recapping the day, talking about what our favorite parts of the day were (me? getting my car back - wahoo!!), and planning out tomorrow, she offers this:

"Mom, I cand't fink aboudt dat wite now. My brwain haz furr on it."

Alrighty, then.

What is it about Friday?

What is it about Friday that both elates and stresses? The joy of the unplanned weekend. The opportunity of the unplanned weekend. The openness of the unplanned weekend. Good things, right?

And yet, it stresses me out a little bit to not know exactly what I'm going to be doing this weekend.

Apparently, I have passed on this over-planning gene to my kids - every moment, they want to know what's next, and then? What's after what's next?

I need to learn to enjoy the moment more. If I can, maybe they can, too.

"There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing....."

This seems fitting for me lately - though I must admit, I'm not purposely postponing things, it just seems to always happen that way.

I'm not sure, but I'd be willing to wager that I've secretly been enrolled in an undergroup time warp experiment where I really only have about 2 hours per day instead of the generally accepted 24. I'm not sure the point of it, except possibly to see how much a harried mother of 3 can possibly cram into the shortest amount of time, all the while trying to gauge at what point the stress and exhaustion catches up to her LOL!

So, suffice it to say, things have been busy around these parts. Not with anything earth shattering, but rather, daily life.

Dexter has hockey twice a week, Bonnie and Clyde, gymnastics twice a week. As hockey ends, basketball will begin, and Clyde is dying to start skating soon, as well as play soccer.

Add in the mundane mom tasks - PTO meetings, volunteering at school, menu planning, grocery shopping, laundry.....life has been a bit like "Groundhog Day" lately. I'm not sure, but I may be stuck in Gobbler's Knob!

Nothing to see here...nothing at all.......

Or so it would seem by my absence, yes no?

Oy - stop, start. stop, start. Seems to be the name of the game around my part of the world.

A new school year is in full swing already - Dexter's a Kindergartner, Bonnie and Clyde are in Beginners Preschool. Add in hockey for Dex and gymnastics for B&C and the weeks get busy.

Better. Soon. I promise.

just another manic......Thursday?

Yeah, I know. It's not how the song goes. I can't help it! Thursdays are our crazy days!

Bonnie and Clyde have school at 8:30. Dexter has school at 9 25 minutes across town.

Bonnie and Clyde are done at 11:30, and Dex is done at 1. Then, at 5:30, everyone goes to swim lessons, followed by dinner at Subway (hey, it's **right** there in the Y. Easy fix!). Home for bath and bed, and BLINK! There went the day.

Nothing all that remarkable about today, just another Thursday in the life and times of us.

How can I stay angry with this?!?!

Overheard from the kitchen, where timeouts were being served au deux:

Clyde: Gawd is gweat
Bonnie: Gawd is dood
Clyde: Tank Oou Gawd
Bonnie: Now, des get out da snacks!

Ok, so not exactly how the prayer goes, but hey, A+ for effort, right?

**sigh**

Sorry it's been so long since I updated. It's been a little rough around the behavior edges. We also recently completed a trip to Kansas City to visit friends, and picked up some germs along the way, so it's been a little rough around the health edges, too.

Do you know how hard it is to type with gloves on?!?!

It is FREEZING here. As in, single digit temp, 45mph wind gusts, and resulting way way way negative wind chills.

Even my office is cold, and seriously? Typing (accurately) with gloves on is difficult. Dexter wants you to know - typing with mittens on is impossible!

Today was good. There was no hitting, no spitting, and no biting. And thanks to a new addition to the stroller armada, kicking is now impossible. Well, kicking one another, anyway. Kicking the footboard and making that annoying clacking sound? That's still possible. But even that was lessened today.

The only thing missing today was the feeling in my fingers and toes.

Did I mention how COLD it is?!?!?!

I think I forgot to schedule in breathing....

Today looks like this:
5:45am
Husband left for work.

6am
My alarm goes off, and I procrastinate getting up until.........

6:10am
Bonnie woke up (and begged "Git me oudda hewe, pease, momma")

6:25am
Entire house is awake, and I feel the opportunity for a shower slipping away.

6:30am
I determine it's now or never, destruction of the house be damned. StormHawks and Pokemon entertain Dexter, and I try to convince Bonnie and Clyde to stay in my bed and watch JoJo and the Wiggles.

6:35-7:10am
Try to shower, get ready, keep Bonnie and Clyde from mortally wounding one another ("buh Momma! He huwt me!!!!")

7:25am
breakfast, which, at 8:19am (the current time), is still ongoing. Waffles, yogurt, milk, apple slices. Gracious! Must be getting ready to grow.

The rest of the day plays out like this:
Must leave house by 9am to make it to the Children's Museum for a class for Dexter at 10am. We'll have lunch there (thank you mac and cheese!!! The Lenten Luncheon of Catholic Champions!!!!) and play for a bit, then head home.

Must pick up dog and drop off kids at my mom's house by 3:30pm. Dog has Vet appt at 4pm.

Pick up Bonnie and Clyde afterwards (Dexter has a sleepover with Cousin) and get home by 5:30pm to meet babysitter.

Dinner reservations at 6:15pm for rescheduled date night.

Sometime, later, fall, exhausted into bed. And breathe.

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness

The title of today's entry is brought to you by Richard Carlson. I don't know who he is, and I don't know if he did something amazing or historical. I do think, though, he must have spent some time in my life recently, though!

I've been missing more than not lately. Sorry about that.

I'm having difficulty finding anything newsworthy or even slightly humorous in the kicking, hitting, pinching, spitting, biting, screaming, whining and crying that has taken over in this house. You know it's bad when Bonnie and Clyde's MDO teacher says "Yep, they were horrible." This woman is as sweet as pie, and they've worn through her already. There are three months of school left!!!! Have mercy..........

Additionally, Dexter's kindergarten "situation" still hasn't been resolved. (The situation being that we don't know where he'll be attending said kindergarten.) We're praying for the best (an opening - he's currently top of the waiting list!) and preparing for the very real possibility that there just won't be movement within the current roster and spot may not open up. To that end, I've gotten all the details on registration at the elementary school across the way, and have a plan B for preschool for Bonnie and Clyde, should Dex be assigned to afternoon K.

Add in a dash of overscheduled and a pinch of marital communication issues, and well, there you have it.

If stress is, indeed, a more socially accepted disease, I'm a popular gal!

A little heads up to the Husband

Actual text of an email sent to Husband moments ago.

Pretty much sums up our day here at the homestead:

1. The movies are being relocated to the green bins and being placed in your office. At least for now. I couldn't think of another place to put them and keep them out of reach for Bonnie and Clyde.

2. All of the Little People are put away right now. One phrase "thou shalt not use LP as projectiles"

3. The slide is put away, and the column by the oven/micro is damaged. We need to put the slide somewhere - AWAY- for a while.

Inferno, with a side of pretzels, please

Things have been rough around the homestead lately. Bonnie and Clyde are marching ever closer to three, which around here, seems to be like me voluntarily marching straight into Dante's Inferno. "Abandon hope, all ye who enter here." Yep, that pretty much sums it up these days!

Today has been the epitome of this, as evidenced by (in no particular order) screaming, spitting, biting, kicking, hitting, hair pulling, and, in an effort worthy of an Academy nomination, a full out temper tantrum over a hot dog (well, actually, the lack thereof).

I **know** this, too, shall pass. I know it. I lived through it with Dexter, I'll live through it with them. It seriously tests the mettle of which I'm made.

They are asleep, thankfully. I'm praying for a long nap today in the hopes that sleep will adjust their attitude-o-meter.

In other news, it's currently 12* outdoors (windchill -1* Ooooo! A warm front!). At least the sun is out!!!!

Q, R, S, 1, 2, 3.......................

There are days that I'm so thankful to be a SAHM. When I'm the first to witness a new kid-ism, I'm particularly thankful.

Today is one of those days.

The Leap Frog Word Whammer was a big hit from Christmas. Learning the ABC song has been a favorite activity of Bonnie and Clyde lately. Bonnie almost has it. At least in her mind.

A B C D E F G H I J K Lemonelopie Q R S 1 2 3 bubbleview yes Y TREEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Please pause for station identification.....

I'm not sure what station I'm broadcasting on, but I can tell you that it's transmitting at a frequency the monkeys in this house don't hear.

It's been a long and tiring day here (day two of no school for the week - this time parent/teacher conferences).

In the last 36 hours, I've come to realize that I can not locate original birth certificates for any of my three children, baptismal certificates for two of my children (was three, prior to the mail arriving today. Thank you St. Mary's!!!!!!!), and social security cards for two children and a husband are also missing.

Oh, and Dexter's baby book is missing, too. greeeeeeeeeeat.

I went to Target yesterday to purchase a fire safe after saying for years I wanted to do so. Those same years were spent bowing to husband's wishes NOT to get one. And now, I can't find anything.

This afternoon will be spent refereeing and organizing. Not exactly two mutually agreeable tasks, but two necessary ones.

I have a headache, and it has excedrin written all over it.

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.

"and when necessary, use words"

This quote, or at least this part of the quote, was featured prominently in the homily by Fr. John yesterday at Mass.

It made me think, and made me realize, that my actions don't always portray the message I'm hoping to send - to my kids, to my husband, to my friends, to my family.

Have you ever noticed this in your life? It was particularly apparent to me, in retrospect, from an instance on Friday.

The kids and I went to Target - mostly for groceries, but also to kill some time so we could meet up with friends at McDs to hand off some maternity wear. Because of the killing time part, we were taking longer than necessary to complete the task, and the natives were getting restless.

By the time we made it through checkout, we'd survived Bonnie and Clyde kicking and hitting, three potty breaks (times 3 kids!), a broken packet of spices, and a handful of items tumbling off our overstuffed cart.

Yet, despite all of this, I wasn't stressed, I wasn't angry, and was generally ready to consider the outing a success. Until the checkout lady said, "Try to have a better rest of your day."

huh.

Apparently my non-verbal communication was not conveying my overall satisfaction (not pleasure, mind you, just not DISsatisfaction) with the events of the day.

So, to add to the list of things I'm working on right now, I'm adding the task of making the outward appearance match the inward joy. It's an extension of changing my approach in parenting the kiddos, trying to ratchet down the ambient noise level in the house, etc.

I'm trying new things like redirecting attitudes, continuing to model proper behavior, and using a calmer front. I suppose, when necessary, I'll use words, too.

This is me, without a nap

A nap by the kids, that is!

Holy cow. I'm pooped.

We had a litany of errands to run today, and I was really counting on some kids' sleeping time to regroup and veg a bit.

yeah. SO not happening.

Guess this means I now have no excuse not to get on the horn to the plumber, the electrician, and the builder. Think they're scrubbing their way out to sea together? That could explain why no one has called me back. Hmmmm.....

In other non-important daily news, I have learned a few things today:
1. A new McDonald's play area is a zoo. Mind you, a cleaner zoo than normal, but a zoo nonetheless.
2. When you tell a precocious 5.5yo that "it's a zoo in there", he's sorely disappointed to see only other children, no lions (or tigers, or bears, OH MY!)
3. That a sleeping 2.5yo girl is not as sleepily transported from car to bed now that she's in panties and has to be woken up to use the potty before resuming her nap.
4. When a 2.5yo girl only takes a 15 minute car nap, it makes for a looooooooong and ugly ugly ugly afternoon.

And lastly - here's my PSA for the day:
To the nice lady behind me at Target today:
I can not begin to express to you just how very much I appreciated you commenting on my children's behavior. I thought it was atrocious, but you insisted that you were impressed. It reminded me that maybe I really AM my worst critic and things aren't always as bad as they seem to me. (I'm being serious here, folks. No sarcasm! I know! ME? no sarcasm?)

So, in the spirit of paying it forward, I vow to tell a mom I don't know what a great job I think she's doing the next time I'm at a store. Will you join me?

Calgon, Take Me Away

Remember this commercial? I think it was a late 80's, early 90's slogan. Growing up, though, it was adopted into our daily lives, and has stuck with me ever since. Apropos anytime things are just....well...just too much.

Or, in the case of today, too little. Too little sleep, that is.

Why is it when you have had too little sleep, everything else becomes exponentially too much?

Too many questions, which are standard fare around here, become enough to send me over the edge when I've had too little sleep.

Too many requests, too much whining, too much singing, too much of it ALL.

I could probably remedy my overtired, overstressed situation by taking a nap. But, napping doesn't actually prove productive in any arena except sleep, so a nap today is just simply not going to happen.

Too many phone calls to make, too much laundry to wash/dry/fold/put away, too much clutter to manage, simply too much to do.

So, while sleep would be a logical choice, I'm going with option number 2 - cookies and caffeine.

Oh, and tomorrow? Bonnie? Clyde? Can we agree that 4 am is simply TOO early?!?!?!