"and when necessary, use words"

This quote, or at least this part of the quote, was featured prominently in the homily by Fr. John yesterday at Mass.

It made me think, and made me realize, that my actions don't always portray the message I'm hoping to send - to my kids, to my husband, to my friends, to my family.

Have you ever noticed this in your life? It was particularly apparent to me, in retrospect, from an instance on Friday.

The kids and I went to Target - mostly for groceries, but also to kill some time so we could meet up with friends at McDs to hand off some maternity wear. Because of the killing time part, we were taking longer than necessary to complete the task, and the natives were getting restless.

By the time we made it through checkout, we'd survived Bonnie and Clyde kicking and hitting, three potty breaks (times 3 kids!), a broken packet of spices, and a handful of items tumbling off our overstuffed cart.

Yet, despite all of this, I wasn't stressed, I wasn't angry, and was generally ready to consider the outing a success. Until the checkout lady said, "Try to have a better rest of your day."

huh.

Apparently my non-verbal communication was not conveying my overall satisfaction (not pleasure, mind you, just not DISsatisfaction) with the events of the day.

So, to add to the list of things I'm working on right now, I'm adding the task of making the outward appearance match the inward joy. It's an extension of changing my approach in parenting the kiddos, trying to ratchet down the ambient noise level in the house, etc.

I'm trying new things like redirecting attitudes, continuing to model proper behavior, and using a calmer front. I suppose, when necessary, I'll use words, too.